Everyone needs to know their personal boundry line for what they will and won't do. And if you do indeed ross that line, you had better have good friends who will pull you back over. Because sometimes we lose ourselves and can't find the line anymore.

~*~

Gotta love when you care just so much for a person. When they've helped you through so much and they really brought the best out of you. When you've been through thick and thin and combated a lot. Been through a lot of good times, and been there for each other through the good times.

And then find out... just maybe... they didn't have as much invested into it all as you'd thought. You hear through the GRAPE VINE that they are having problems. That for some reason, they refuse to talk about to you.

When did I ever seem like I would be anything but understanding and sympathetic? When did I EVER come across as anything but the BEST friend I could be? When did that change? Because it's now withdrawn and all I am is hurt and in pain. The refusal to talk to me. The refusal to do much of anything with me. Saying you'll hang out with me but then I see neither head nor tail. The affinity for locking yourself away in your room for one reason for another.

All I wanted to do was help. It's all I can do. But you won't even do that. So now I'm hurt, I'm bitter, and I'm angry. Why shouldn't I be? If it weren't for the grape vine, I wouldn't even know you were doing bad in school. That you were dropping classes left and right becuse you were suffering.

Well guess what. I tried reaching out. So much so I stress, I've cried, I've gotten myself sick. 'You don't want to worry anyone'. GUess what? You did. And now we hurt and are bitter. All we wanted was to have the friendship and understanding we offer returned. We tried for probably a whole YEAR.

I could go on. But I'm in class and it hurts and this isn't the place. So yes, treat it like it sucks and it does, but you're brushing it aside. Don't pay attention to the collateral and those you've hurt in efforts to hide yourself from your problems.

I hope the best for you, I truly do. And if you need me, I'm here and you can come to me. But I'm not reaching out anymore.

Everyone needs to know their personal boundry line for what they will and won't do. And if you do indeed ross that line, you had better have good friends who will pull you back over. Because sometimes we lose ourselves and can't find the line anymore.

~*~

Curry,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when I threw up in women's clothing and I saw you sit on my best friend. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand how awful I've felt. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep your photo as a memory. You should also know that I never openly mocked our friendship .

Go and drown yourself,
Brittany (Jhin)



~*~

That's funny

-> How you do the Letter Meme:

Dear (the last person who left a comment on your journal):

I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___. I think I realized it ___2___ ___3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___ .

___12___,
-Your name-


1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister


2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your dog ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes


3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kabob - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife


4. What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out


5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard soufflé
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk


6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C. - Emotional
One Tree Hill - Open
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed


7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this.
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks


8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service


9. The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your photo
C/D - The oil stocks
E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity
I/J - The results of your blood-sample
K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - David's tricot outfits
Y/Z - Your grades from college


10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Always will remember
C/D - Never will forget
E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked
I/J - Always have felt dirty before
K/L - Will tell the authorities about
M/N - Told in my confession today about
O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
S/T - Get sick when I think of
U/V - Always will try to forget
W/X - Am better off without
Y/Z - Never liked


11. What do you prefer to drink?
Water- Our friendship
Beer - Senility
Soft drink - A new life as a clone
Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building
Wine - Cocaine abuse
Cider - A passionate interest for mice
Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
Whiskey - To ruin the second world war
Other - To hate the Boston Celtics


12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm regards
USA - Best regards
England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Spain - Go and drown yourself
China - Disgusting regards
Germany - With ease
Japan - Go burn
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Fuck off now
France - In pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family

Everyone needs to know their personal boundry line for what they will and won't do. And if you do indeed ross that line, you had better have good friends who will pull you back over. Because sometimes we lose ourselves and can't find the line anymore.

~*~

A meme ripped from because I really need to let the world I'm still sorta alive.

1. Where is your cell phone?
On my desk not even a foot away from me.
2. Where is your significant other?
In class I think. Not here and that's all I know and stress about. And yes, I HAVE one of those now, a significant other...
3. Your hair?
Boring but clean
4. Your mother?
At home?
5. Your father?
In Holand!
6. Your favorite thing?
Not sure, sleeping is pretty high up there, but I think it's contending heavily with my boyfriend...
7. Your dream last night?
Boyfriend demanded I go out and get Puppy parts. It pissed me off xD
8. Your dream/goal?
To find One Piece and become King of the Pira-- oh wait..
9. The room you're in?
Dorm rooooooom <3
10. Your hobby?
My boyfriend nah, I kid. Video games is it. That and drawing/art.
11. Your fear?
To many to count, we'll just go with abandonment and spiders
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years?
Not dead.
13. Where were you last night?
Watching house and sleeping
14. What you're not?
Cool, cute, and interesting xD
15.One of your wish list items?
Boyfriend to stop getting harassed by his mom D:<
-
16. Where you grew up?
Michigan/California
17. The last thing you did?
answered number 16
18. What are you wearing?
My underwear I do that, you know, because I'm a girl
19. Your TV?
Don't have one beyond the one in the common room where I watch House every Tuesday.
20. Your pet?
My kitty who is not here in the dorm with me, sadly
21. Your computer?
Mac Notebook. It's decent.
22. Your mood?
Content for now
23. Missing someone?
Yea...
24. Your car?
I wish.
25. Something you're not wearing?
Authentic Amur Leopard fur. Or any fur for that matter. And I never will
26. Favorite store?
No idea. Video game store maybe.
27. Your summer?
Best so far
28. Love someone?
Yes, whether or not I'm actually IN love is up in the air because I don't know how you tell.
29. Your favorite color?
Green
30. When is the last time you laughed?
In class when we were talking about the Manchurian Candidate
31. Last time you cried?
not sure really
32. Who will do this?
Anyone who wants to
33. How many sisters?
One, and she's annoying.
34. How many brothers?
Two and one is annoying, the other awesome.
35. How many children?
None thank god, I have pills to prevent that
36. Drink of choice?
Unsweet Ice Tea
37. How many pairs of shoes?
Two/three
38. What is on your TV right now?
noooothing. No tv

Everyone needs to know their personal boundry line for what they will and won't do. And if you do indeed ross that line, you had better have good friends who will pull you back over. Because sometimes we lose ourselves and can't find the line anymore.

~*~

Stoled this from Voudka/too many characters/KK/you know who you are ¬.¬

RULES:
1. Put Your iTunes, Windows Media Player, ETC on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Put any comments in italics after the song name.


1. If someone says, "Is this okay?" You say?
Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess opening theme - OST
That wouldn't tell anyone anything all things considered...

2. How would you describe yourself?
Forgive Me - Evanesence
Figures I'd get some sappy angsty emo song ¬.¬'

3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
Mozart/Figaro - Trans-Siberian Orchestra
That they be musically inclined I guess?

4. How do you feel today?
Look At Us Now Baby - Sarina Paris
Who exactly 'Us' is I'd really like to know.

5. What is your life's purpose?
Stay with Me - Libera
To apparently be very deeply in love with someone to the point where they mean everything to me and I follow them every where ._. "You are everything I know, whichever way I go, forever stay with me."

6. What is your motto?
Walter Reed - Michael penn (House MD OST)
Yea... "I'm ranting while I'm raving, there's nothing here worth saving. Tell me now what more do you need, take me to Walter Reed tonight. Baby I've lost the will for fighting over everything."

7. What do your friends think of you?
Siren 01 - Silent Hill
I'm a bipolar world that is psychotic at best and morbidly deranged and out of touch at worst?

8. What do you think of your parents?
Somewhere - Within Temptation
But I know where my parents are... and I love them ;.;

9. What do you think about very often?
Run! Run! Run! - Maki Otsuki
Wow.. One Piece theme.... what does THAT say?

10. What is 2 + 2?
God, Please let me Go back - Josh Rouse (House MD OST)
Math just got a little more interesting....

11. What do you think of your best friend?
They - Jem
Conformists and more I'm sorries....

12. What do you think of the person you like?
Prevent This Tragedy - Alkaline Trio
jeez... what is my itunes FILLED with!? -.- angstangstangst

13. What is your life story?
Gomen Nasai - t.A.T.u
Wow... just wow.... I'm sorry in a flippin' different language -.-

14. What do you want to be when you grow up?
The Sailor Song - Toybox
Oh jeez... thar be no words XD Finally something funny

15. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Next Contestant - Nickelback
Yes... XD a perfect song. Though I really don't like anyone at this point I think.

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?
The Legend of MAX - DDR
Yes, thar will be DDR at mah wedding...

17. What will they play at your funeral?
Watashi ga iru Yo - One Piece
Another One Piece song. I win?

18. What is your hobby/interest?
Bittersweet - Within Temptation
Being angsty apparently.

19. What is your biggest fear?
The Scientist - Coldplay

20. What is your biggest secret?
Before The Dawn - Evanescence
I have way to much Evanescence....

21. What do you think of your friends?
I'm a believer - Smash mouth
lawl... no joke

22. What will you post this as?
Deora Ar Mo Chroi - Enya
Figure THAT out >D

Everyone needs to know their personal boundry line for what they will and won't do. And if you do indeed ross that line, you had better have good friends who will pull you back over. Because sometimes we lose ourselves and can't find the line anymore.

~*~

So it seems this whole living on campus isn't working real well for me. Or maybe it is and I'm having a shitty way of adapting to it. Weee. <sigh>

I'd go into details, but I really don't want to and it's kind of personal. But mucho hugs to you all for being there for those who have. Sorry I've been scarce.